Juliet Freak

Live Life. Breathe Life.

2012-01-18T00:20:00.002+08:00

Sometimes it ain't easy to express your feelings to anyone closer than you.
It was and will never be easier for me.
I won't so "Oh my smiles are ~~fake~~ and behind that smile is the ~~sadness~~"
That's Bull-TOOT- alright?

But God knows how long I've been tackling these bad emotions.
Depression Depression Depression.

Y U NO GO AWAY ?!

As much I want to sound or look as if I'm okay but my mind can be very stubborn.

None of my family knows about it. I wasn't brave enough to tell them.

I AM NOT brave enough to even say "Mom,Dad, I need help."
Or should I even tell them when it started?

I can still remember the age. 10.
The lucky number is 10.

Lucky?

no.

I wish I know how to tackle this stupid depression. It made me do stuff that I will regret just as soon as I came into my senses. The only thing I know is to just PRAY. Praying doesn't hurt one bit. Praying doesn't cost any money. Praying helps me to realise that God will always be there to listen to me.

Apart from that, sometimes I let go of the people I know or knew. (My english isn't that good ya' know) I let go of my then-boyfriend once. I let go of my then-bestfriend. Now, I let go of my another then-bestfriend. I feel bad as always. I don't know why, but being away from everyone seems to be working out pretty well.

However, the skies don't stay bright and blue that long, aye?

As much as I want it to stay that way, positive for that matter, I will always ended up crying for no reason. Ugh! It disgust me to say this. I cry a lot. Alone. Away from every breathing human beings.

Why can't it be cured without the help of professionals?

I didn't want to have depression. It isn't my choice. It isn't what I want.

I hate it when my friends said, "Don't think about it la"
"Think positive"
"Everyone cares for you"

"Pray to God"

Sorry to say this, those words doesn't console me like you wanted it to be.
Gosh! "Pray to God" ? I will. I always do. I do feel fine.
Depression isn't easy you know.

Especially when You have once tried committing suicide.

~~Once~~? ~~Twice~~? I lost count.

Ouh gosh! Those memories will just come rushing into your mind like Wildfire.

Even water can't fight fire.

Sometimes, I asked myself this stupid question :

Apart from God, Who am I living for?

Family?

Friends?

Future?

=.="
All I want to do is to let it all out (again, unfortunately)

I like looking in the mirror and scream "GET A LIFE" to that Girl In The Mirror.

It makes me wanna kick start a new day without actually thought back about the depression I had earlier on.

Sometimes, a few little jokes will do to bring back those smiles.

Well, although I may be struggling now, I hope I can still have a few more strength left in me to carry on with my life journey.

Like what I said in my twitter.

IF YOU CAN'T DEAL WITH CRUEL PEOPLE,

YOU CAN'T LIVE IN THIS CRUEL WORLD.

For my case? I need to deal with this CRUEL DEPRESSION.

~End~

Movie and Show Biz

2011-11-12T16:19:00.001+08:00

Yesterday I watched "500 Days of Summer!!"

It's an awesome movie isn't it !

I couldn't believe that I wasted 2 years of my life not watching this!

This movie thought me a valuable lesson :

A love story never exist. It's either a moment to be together or A moment to move on.

I like both characters though.

Tom plays as a loner.

Summer plays as a secretive and very much a confuse women.

It's a relationship full of roller coaster emotions.

One day they love each other, and the next day they fight.

Really relates to a reality.

Another reason why I watched this movie was because Tom looks like the guy I used to date last year.
The way he act, dressed, looked like and the way he smile.

My goodness, I still miss him.

but what I am supposed to do right? He doesn't love me.

Not worth a try to contact him back.

Move on Hanim. Just move on.

So, in relation to the movie UP THERE ^^^ hehe!
Have you watch NEW GIRL ?!

It's a MUST to watch!

Just love Zooey Deschanel's character !

Super pretty but geeky at the same time!

Cool shit I tell you! =D

Jess and Nick really look cute together right? right?! RIGHT?!?!

hahaha! =D

Having Post-NewGirl Syndrome right now! =D

Can't wait to watch them together some day! hehe!

My Frustration. My Life. My Story

2011-11-10T23:08:00.001+08:00

One thing for sure, I don't understand myself. There's so many negative vibe around me. Each time I felt it, I got breathing difficulties. I'm not exaggerating. Trust me, I'm not !
Since young I don't get as much attention from people. I get the attention usually at the wrong timing. Like for example, when I was sick, everyone just don't care. When it was my 7th, 8th, 9th birthday, no one cares.
Which is why I grew up not wanting to care for anything at all.

1) I don't celebrate birthdays. Be it mine or my friends.
2) I had trust issues with people, including my parents.
3) I had problem forgetting about the past.
4) I suffered from depression, so that explain why I'm a confused and irrelevant person.

I'm not writing this just to get all the attention, I'm writing this just to expressed all my emotions!
I know my sarcasm might have hurt people who tried to help me, but I'm used to living and growing all by myself. I don't want people to help me. I just want people to listen to my problem. Out of all the friends I have, NONE of them truly know the REAL me. I'm still doubting myself whether or not I should tell them the real secret. Layers under layers of ego and anger, there is some truth yet to be told. That truth might throw away my reputation and my face. but who cares right? No one do.

When I was about 5years old, I saw a scene of people being abused. It was someone close and dear to me. I watch her being hit by a chair continuously. I walked away, did not dare to say anything.
When I was 9years old, the same person I mentioned above doesn't love me as her ______ .
I lost a _____ just for no reason.
I got her back when I reach 14yrs old.

At that point of time, when I grew up, I was vulnerable. I was a follower. I just follow what they say. It did sucks though. I never like the way some of my primary school friends treated me. I wasn't popular and I don't seem approachable due to my appearance. For some reason, it affected my badly in terms of my self esteem.
I got anger issues. I have habits of throwing things. When I was 13-14yrs old, I suffered from depression. It leads me to a slight anorexia. I lost 20kg in a month. I lost focus in school. I couldn't walk properly and stand for a longer period of time. I fainted a lot of time. It affected me pretty badly. When I got angry, I scratched my wrist until it turns red. I used pins and poke my stomach. I tried to commit suicide since I was 10 years old. I pictured myself hanging on the window of my room. I tried to jump down from the block in front of my house.
I regretted for doing so or for thinking of doing it. Not everyone know what I did, until now in which I had decided to write it in my blog.

People might be thinking that I might be going mental but I'm not. Even if I am, I blame it on my childhood. I don't know why I can't let go of all this pressure and frustrations! It's eating me up alive!

However, I shall pray and pray to Allah that all of this will come to an end. I just hope it will. I'm just to tired to face all of this.

2011-09-16T22:30:00.002+08:00

I'm too stress up! Can I dye my hair this colour??

Haha!

Hell yeah I'm stress!

Eventhough art is like DONE! I still stress..

I wanna blog long long like no use right.. So...

BYE!

2011-09-02T23:14:00.000+08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dp4Zail3FQA&feature=relmfu

I <3 HER!

What the FLUTE!?!?!

2011-08-04T23:21:00.001+08:00

OKAY! Havent been updating my blog, like what the flute kan..
anyway, i update also no one read.. HAHAHAH!!! :P
Prelim gone! But i dun think I gonna do that well so Gonna expect more Ds instead of Bs..
my Eng fail alr.. -,-"
Somemore my mom confirm say I fail bcoz I use Facebbok via my hp all the time.. =.="
I did that once in a while seyy.. haiyooo...
AHHHHHH!

Die la die la die la! If i really do fail, maybe my hp kene taken away? or cant use comp? or even worst! can go OUT! alaaaaa!

K Hanim Pessimist alr.. what the flute!

These past few days months been hanging out with Beruk..
Awesome friend indeed! And still I wanna brag the watch Beruk gave me! HAHA! I like it, what to do mah, it's PINK! hello! PINK OI! haha!

First unofficial date with beruk was fun and tiring but still fun.

Walked from Bukit Gombak to Bukit Batok was actually quite near ey... not bad! 20mins tops..

I was shock actually to find out that both places quite near..oh well, I dun really go out that often.. hehe!

So yeah, it's an awesome fun-tastic Jalan-Jalan with my friend from 9.30am -4pm!!

hehe!!

Should I upload Candid photo of Beruk that I took that time?? HMMM??!?!?

"I put my arms around you..."

Been listening to the song over and over again.. It's 2002 song but still, I prefer listening to undiscovered songs rather than listening to Lady Gaga, Rihanna or Justi Bieber's songs.. Bah!!

When I'm listening to this song, I kept flashing back my past memories in the previous years..

My love life..

In different relationships...

Good and Bad memories..

Things went a bit haywire after my short unofficial r/s with Sumait..

Went thru like Crappy r/s with the rest of the guys I know..

There's Hazmi, my 5yrs of friendship guy..

Even my sis knew about him coz I used to be very close to him.

However that was last time..

After we UNOFFICIALLY dated, things come to an end in a split second.

It wasn't a clean break up thou..well, I didnt stead with him, so I shouldnt say "break up" right?

Whatever it is, It's a lesson learnt, things can happen in a split seconds..

Well, If I fall in love with a guy, I give full 100% love to him..

But I guess it wasn't worth giving to Hazmi...

Faiz was the next guy I knew..

We met thru fb..well, dun get me wrong...he was my primary 3 classmate and schmate..

just tat we dun talk wen we're in primary sch..

but we gt close just by sharing some past things in primary sch..

Gt to understand him more..

But that time wasn't the right time to hang out with him cause I wasn't in the Right State of Mind..

I was depressed with problems towering over me..

So I kept crying in front of him..

I found myself abit dependable towards him.

that feelin sucks I guess..

Found out we like each other..

But it didnt turn out right after a few weeks later..

Love really do jeopardise Friendship..

But I really appreciate knwing him..

He was the first Guy to have ever wipe my tears of when I cried...

It shows how a shy boy like him is Sweet behind that hidden eyes of him(:

how we end of friendship?

well, simply said, I'm the one who screw it up..

like I say, I wasnt in the right state of mind, so i tend to scream or rant anger at him..

Screw up big time.

But I know he has long gone move on with it..

I'm still learning my mistakes and trying to move on..

Like what I told Tiara, so long I met another person, I'll let go of the previous person I once love..

chey! Hanim Emo girl pe sia!!

HAHA!

But so far, these two guys taught me a life-long lessons..

I'm glad to part of their few minutes life..

at least they kept me entertain...heh!

May Allah SWT blessed them with their one of a kind girl.. heh!

So yeah...no I'm positive thinking, I realise, I must look at every situation a glass half full..(:

May Allah SWT guide me throughout my life journey..

AMIN

Expressway

2011-07-04T01:42:00.002+08:00

Yo humans!
Havnt been updating much.
All the time, i did some studying and lazying.
Blah blah blah.

I'm bored. K bye ppl heh!

2011-05-08T12:52:00.003+08:00

My pets Terrapin and cats are sooooo Adorable!

Luckily they're photogenic! hehe!

(^_^)[V]

2010-12-18T19:40:00.002+08:00

Wooots!!! 4Distinctions for Nlvl!!

But still, Congrats to Wei Si for getting 7 Distinctions with points of ALSO 7 !

Wah! Salute you!

I check my higher nitec course I got Accounting, BioTech and much more better ... ELECTRICAL ENGINEERING!! :DDD and still gt alot ah. ;D but sec 5 first. ;)

HAHAH!

Okay, I end here. xD

Short and simple coz I busy.

Where's the HUMANITY, Humans?!

2010-11-20T19:40:00.006+08:00

||SHARKS||

These ancient predators fascinate global people.

Not because they are known to be part of prehistoric species that have been around for 400million years or because of their huge appetite on their preys

UNFORTUNATELY, it's fins are known to be mouth-watering and expensive delicacies set on fine dining tables.

These natural-born hunters are being hunted by illegal fishermen.

What a disgrace to humanity!

SHARKS around the world are facing a tangled life-death situation!
-An unsustainable exploitation due to escalating demands for popular dish,

Shark's Fin Soup, and indiscriminate fishing!

It gets more disappointing when these enormity crimes that these fishermen committed are not taken seriously. Don't they ever use their brains?

I was watching National Geography when the documentary was far too sick for me.

Sharks are caught by fishermen, their fins were cut off WHEN they are still breathing.

How sad it was to see the sadness, pain and death they're going through during that intense 5mins of being "fin-less".

After that, one by one are thrown into the sea and it gets worst.

The sharks have no fins!
They can't swim!

And eventhough they won't be drowning, they are losing blood that eventually will stain the ocean.

They can't find food!
THEY WILL DIE IN STARVATION!

More people are demanding for shark's fin. More sharks' LIVES are in danger!

AND MORE TRACES OF SHARK'S SKELETONS MOUNTING THE SEABED!
This unthoughtful behaviour is causing these RESPECTED predators to become PREY of humans like us.

WHY do they ONLY want Shark's FIN?!

WHY can't they take their meat along as part of the dish?!

WHAT brings that ROYALTY to that dish?! (Shark's fin soup?!)

As stated by the fisherman himself :

Sharks are food. We eat them. God gave us food. We eat!
What's wrong with eating sharks' fin?
It(shark) is part of the chain(food chain).

HOWEVER, the shark's fin are TASTELESS and yet it is sold at $100 or above?!?!

What a dish?!

or indecently, WHAT A DOUCHEBAG for people who spent their hard-earn money on just a blunt taste Sharkfin soup?!?!

I rather spent that on my school fees(cause I haven't pay my fees. If I don't pay on time, No nlvl results -.-)

What cause a stir to my emotion is that not only sharks were their victims,

the rest of sea creatures are affected too.

The fishermen caught an innocent sea turtle, turn it upside down, use the hard side of the axe and hit it! That turtle struggled and bled. Unfortunately, it's life was not spared. Poor turtle died.

Another scene was that they were running around like hooligans on the frozen ice at Artic Ocean, swinging their axes and brutally cut off the head of innocent sea lions who are sleeping or just laying there.

The short 2sec of the sea lions' "screams" were heard and got to me that I almost felt my heart jumped out of my throat.

Yet, the men just laugh!

This barbaric act needs to stop!

I don't understand why animals are use as "toys" for others to hurt them.

Such abuse, such overfishing etc must end ASAP.

For example,

if millions of sharks are killed, its' population drop instantly.

This will cause the animals(1) they feed on, increase.

When these animals(1) increase, the animals(2) they feed on will decrease.

and what they(2) feed on will eventually increase. etc etc down the food chain.

For an instant, taking sharks out of the ecosystem may eventually stir up the marine habitat.

If predator decreased, their prey increased, their prey's prey decrease, ....increase.

This will destroy the Reef Community.

As stated by a Marine Ecologist :

" Removing such an important predator always has knock on

effects as they are hard to compensate for in a natural environment."

All this information is written after I've done researches.

Out of curiosity and also meaningful purpose.

2010-11-16T20:46:00.005+08:00

AHH!

Woke up in the middle of the night, VOMITED =.="

Feel very drowsy to the fullest. =.=

Then in the afternoon, again wanna vomit but didn't.

It feels like the world is spinning .

Soooo bored ler!

Can't wait for this friday(or is it thurs?)

Gonna watch movie with my friends!

What movie?

Harry Potter la!

Go away Vampires! Wizards incoming!!

Hahahaha!

Now onwards, gonna spent QUALITY time practising my piccolo.

=.=

Die liao!

Mrs Chua told me my playing very loud. HAHA!

Tell me, HOW to play the highest highest Bflat SOFTLY?!?!

Wahhh! Siao!

Trying my best to overcome that problem.

Practise makes perfect right?!

heh!

Need a new specs seyy!!!

My specs very very slanted !

EEEEK!

Hate it!

2010-11-14T20:59:00.008+08:00

||One day before the Concert||

BERLYN!!! :D

Me and ALIFF! :DD

Me and Amin!

||During the Concert's Interval.||

2010-11-14T11:30:00.002+08:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Yesterday Musica Fantasia Grandioso 5 was awesome eventhough some parts abit cock up but still, fun!! :DD

7night of July bar 129 will be the only bar I'll remember. xDD

The bar that stress 3 of us to the fullest! haha!

Some pics Isk upload got alot of my eyes close siaaaaa!

only gt one HALF-OPEN EYES siaaa! like wtf kan!

but hack care. gotta get use to flash again. Long time haven't take pic with flash, my eyes also cock up ye. HAHA! eyes can cock up?! WEIRD INDEED... haha!

So I spent 2mths in ITE Band. Meet funny section mates, Alif, Amin, Jennifer and Berlyn !!!

They're fun people to hang out with! :DD

Last time, I USED to be Amin's "senior", teaching and guiding him in flute playing.

Now his turn to be my Senior and taught me how to play some of the pieces.

(^_^)[V]

Pics will be uploaded soon. I hope. hehe!

And lastly, Gonna miss my pack schedule Band pract - my ITE Band Babes and Dudes I met there and joke around with. ):

Sometimes I joke around with Berlyn between short and tall or mature or immature,

Idris was fun to talk to, he said sax are sexy . I said Flute are more elegant! xD

I always like to find fault with him,joking le, he just go with the flow.

Jennifer are more to like guiding me in terms of sch(:

She advices me about ITE, Olvl, Poly stuff..

I was planning to go to ITE, Higher Nitec(if gt enough points to go H.N.)

I was also planning to continue to sec5 if my points are about 15 or below.

I want go sec5 but I duwan go SYF can?

-.-

I wan go poly becoz my dad has high hope for me. Which is partially good plus bad.

-.-"

Okay nvm. I have a long day to think about it though.

Results in 1mths+ time.. Hoping for the best.

(^_^)[V]

2010-11-08T22:20:00.001+08:00

Cliffs Along The Sea from Christian Hansen on Vimeo.

(^-^)[V]

2010-11-08T22:07:00.000+08:00

"A boy and a girl were playing together. The boy had a collection of marbles. The girl had some sweets with her. The boy told the girl that he will give her all his marbles in exchange for her sweets. The girl agreed.

The boy kept the biggest and the most beautiful marble aside and gave the rest to the girl. The girl gave him all her sweets as she had promised.

That night, the girl slept peacefully. But the boy couldn't sleep as he kept wondering if the girl had hidden some sweets from him the way he had hidden his best marble."

Moral of the story: "If you don't give your hundred percent in a relationship, you'll always keep doubting if the other person has given his/her hundred percent.. This is applicable for any relationship like love, employer-employee relationship etc., Give your hundred percent to everything you do and sleep peacefully."

2010-11-07T16:09:00.002+08:00

Guess what!

Starting from tmr, I'm having jam pack weekdays!!

ugh!

This is stressing but still, fun! Atleast gt smthg to do then NTG to do.

Bought pants and shoe alr.

Collared,long sleeves shirt haven't.

boy, this is stressing.

ah!

found one alr. but nt sure if its appropriate.

waiting for sis to tell me correct or not.

----------------------------------------------------------

Things become okay.

Then it happen again.

Are you lying again or what?

=.="

-----------------------------------------------------

Today Gt Harry Potter show. Woots.

------------------------------------------------------------

K bye!

2010-11-04T13:35:00.003+08:00

Summer started with a small death
I grabbed onto his clothing
and he left a little room open for me.

He works hard for the unripe,
sour piece of fruit like me.
He sang for me and walked long distances.

He shaded me from a sun whose
rays were as sharp as knives.

Summer ends with the coming of the typhoons and rain.
If you cry like the rain,
your youth goes with the season.

The stories of summer are hidden
beneath the longer sleeves you wear.
As the cries of the cicadas dim,
I hope you'll remember.

Stupid comp is creating a big problem.

soooo, will take a longer time to help them transpose song.

Which is much tougher without the the help of comp.

Gah! Salah timing. =.="

2010-10-27T22:15:00.004+08:00

I was referring to ANOTHER GUY la BODOH! no need to sound me pe!

Cibai! Terase pe boy! oh wait ! you dun understand malau lang! grrrrrrrrrr!!! Past stick to the past la!

=.="

GET THIS WORDS DRILLED INTO YOUR FREAKISHLY ENLARGED HEAD :
HANIM DON'T LIVE A LIFE TO PLEASE OTHERS!
HANIM HAVE FEELINGS TOO GOD DAMMIT!
IF I EVER BORE YOU, WHY THE HELL DID YOU EVER WANT ME TO TALK TO YOU?
YOU EXPECT ME TO ENTERTAIN YOU BUT YOU DON'T DO ANYT IN RETURN.
KNNBCB! WHAT AM I? HUMAN LA! NOT YOUR SLAVE! =.="
And I thought you won't cause any drama, you cause me to doubt our friendship deeper. -.-"

If you think I'm referring to you, go AHEAD! I'm referring to two ppl yg tk guna!

2010-10-24T02:31:00.003+08:00

Been going to and fro to Tampines/(smwer in Simei) lately..

My butt hurts sitting 1hr++ in the bus..=.="

Not forgetting bus sick!!

Kept asking DAD to pick me up but he always can't etc etc..=.="

Okay, I'm bored, and can't sleep!! Its like 2.33am now.

Geez! Thanks to Afternoon sleep, den can't sleep alr.

Monday got Exco/SL meeting at RP..Can't wait..

Dunnoe why I feel like wanting to go there.

But I doubt I can come, mom confirm stop me.

Everytime want to go band, she CONFIRM stop me, causing me to come late evrytime..=.="

Great! Hate being late..=.=""

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kept having migraine...becoz of that...gt strains of red(migraine hair?) hair like popping out of my head..=.=" UGH-GLEE! xP

I feel OLD. OMG! =OOO

heh! wah random.

2010-10-14T20:54:00.008+08:00

For the past 4Years and still counting, I have 4 Cute Terrapin(Tortoises).

Now, my family welcome 2 Adorable Little KITTENS! :D

So its like 6 littles in my house.. :D

BEAR WITH THE BIG PHOTOS! (:

They are Comel and Caca.

Currently sick. having Fever + Sorethroat + Flu = Totally @$#@$$%#%$ !!

hehe! Been potato couching from 10am-6pm! haha!

Imagine how BIG my ass will be.. xDD

Today I have to go to ITE Band for Sectionals but because of fever, I had to give in. =.="

Sad! I was looking forward for my first day in ITE Band!

Worst still, tomorrow 7.15am-12pm I got band in MSL.

Reach home probably about 1pm+, and "depart" from hom at 4pm.

1hr ride to Tampines Interchange and to ITE Simei.

After that, 6-9pm band in ITE.

TIGHT Schedule!!!

Mom was like telling me that my commitment is everywhere.

Agree, but isn't that better than staying home all day. Not forgetting that I CAN'T WORK!!

Mom told me to give up either one because my weight had been fluctuating so much.

Ignore (:

I know she cares, but I just want to live up my dream to be a guest player, and ITE Band is one of it. (: Well, not a good flautist, but hey! It doesn't hurt to experience the moment right!

(^_^)[V]

2010-10-14T20:54:00.007+08:00

For the past 4Years and still counting, I have 4 Cute Terrapin(Tortoises).

Now, my family welcome 2 Adorable Little KITTENS! :D

So its like 6 littles in my house.. :D

BEAR WITH THE BIG PHOTOS! (:

They are Comel and Caca.

Currently sick. having Fever + Sorethroat + Flu = Totally @$#@$$%#%$ !!

hehe! Been potato couching from 10am-6pm! haha!

Imagine how BIG my ass will be.. xDD

Today I have to go to ITE Band for Sectionals but because of fever, I had to give in. =.="

Sad! I was looking forward for my first day in ITE Band!

Worst still, tomorrow 7.15am-12pm I got band in MSL.

Reach home probably about 1pm+, and "depart" from hom at 4pm.

1hr ride to Tampines Interchange and to ITE Simei.

After that, 6-9pm band in ITE.

TIGHT Schedule!!!

Mom was like telling me that my commitment is everywhere.

Agree, but isn't that better than staying home all day. Not forgetting that I CAN'T WORK!!

Mom told me to give up either one because my weight had been fluctuating so much.

Ignore (:

I know she cares, but I just want to live up my dream to be a guest player, and ITE Band is one of it. (: Well, not a good flautist, but hey! It doesn't hurt to experience the moment right!

(^_^)[V]

2010-10-14T20:54:00.005+08:00

For the past 4Years and still counting, I have 4 Cute Terrapin(Tortoises).

Now, my family welcome 2 Adorable Little KITTENS! :D

So its like 6 littles in my house.. :D

BEAR WITH THE BIG PHOTOS! (:

They are Comel and Caca.

Currently sick. having Fever + Sorethroat + Flu = Totally @$#@$$%#%$ !!

hehe! Been potato couching from 10am-6pm! haha!

Imagine how BIG my ass will be.. xDD

Today I have to go to ITE Band for Sectionals but because of fever, I had to give in. =.="

Sad! I was looking forward for my first day in ITE Band!

Worst still, tomorrow 7.15am-12pm I got band in MSL.

Reach home probably about 1pm+, and "depart" from hom at 4pm.

1hr ride to Tampines Interchange and to ITE Simei.

After that, 6-9pm band in ITE.

TIGHT Schedule!!!

Mom was like telling me that my commitment is everywhere.

Agree, but isn't that better than staying home all day. Not forgetting that I CAN'T WORK!!

Mom told me to give up either one because my weight had been fluctuating so much.

Ignore (:

I know she cares, but I just want to live up my dream to be a guest player, and ITE Band is one of it. (: Well, not a good flautist, but hey! It doesn't hurt to experience the moment right!

(^_^)[V]

2010-10-14T20:54:00.004+08:00

For the past 4Years and still counting, I have 4 Cute Terrapin(Tortoises).

Now, my family welcome 2 Adorable Little KITTENS! :D

So its like 6 littles in my house.. :D

BEAR WITH THE BIG PHOTOS! (:

They are Comel and Caca.

Currently sick. having Fever + Sorethroat + Flu = Totally @$#@$$%#%$ !!

hehe! Been potato couching from 10am-6pm! haha!

Imagine how BIG my ass will be.. xDD

Today I have to go to ITE Band for Sectionals but because of fever, I had to give in. =.="

Sad! I was looking forward for my first day in ITE Band!

Worst still, tomorrow 7.15am-12pm I got band in MSL.

Reach home probably about 1pm+, and "depart" from hom at 4pm.

1hr ride to Tampines Interchange and to ITE Simei.

After that, 6-9pm band in ITE.

TIGHT Schedule!!!

Mom was like telling me that my commitment is everywhere.

Agree, but isn't that better than staying home all day. Not forgetting that I CAN'T WORK!!

Mom told me to give up either one because my weight had been fluctuating so much.

Ignore (:

I know she cares, but I just want to live up my dream to be a guest player, and ITE Band is one of it. (: Well, not a good flautist, but hey! It doesn't hurt to experience the moment right!

(^_^)[V]

2010-10-06T11:51:00.006+08:00

All of which I thought it was true but it turns out to be a dream. A lie to be specific.

Even if I was someone that can't be tolerate, a person with full of negative thoughts that worry others, I am just a Gullible Fool to think that you are someone I should look up to was just the biggest mistake and regret I have ever made. And to think that you are a good and bright person, I'm sorry because I'm doubting it pretty badly. All that effort into helping you has gone down the drain. You lie? You act? You were too unsure about making real decisions.

And to think that I am that happy person was partially true.

Everyone has their sad side. Even I do, with needless to say, I've gone through what you have gone through, even if the subject was was different, the "storyline" was the same. So that doesn't make us any different, right?

It seems that you don't treasure our friendship as much as I do. So will I forget everything, Every memories? Every Laughter? Every Tears? Every Anger? I will forget you but the memories will be replace as pain that scarred me really badly. It hurts when I have to go through it a lot of times. Meeting different people in a different environment but ending all of it the same way. I must have gotten all professional in this. (Haha!)

Your teachings brought me one step closer to achieving something I thought I can't succeed.
However, what do my teachings brought you to?
I believe it's NOTHING. I assume your laziness brought you closer to the ground more than flying you up high? I am not happy. I am disappointed. Furthermore, your addiction has brought you more than a companionship to your loneliness, but in a treacherous way. You are destroying yourself. I have no rights in disapproving what you like to do as it is your life and your decisions. However, I am also worried what it might bring you.

You seem to be fantasize by the fictions more.

When are you going to change?

Or have you already change?

I doubt so.

I see more potential in you that you have yet to see it for yourself.

Please wake up.

Even if you tried avoiding my presence, you succeed in doing so, but you can't avoid your own bad future. Not that I'm saying I hold your good future.

Don't you remember saying to me that everything will be alright if I think positive?

Try saying that to yourself and see how it'll helps.

I did my best. Now it is your turn to help yourself.

2010-10-05T20:16:00.003+08:00

Booyah Readers..(:

Long time I havent blog.

Been Busy like DUH! thanks to Nlvl ye. heh!

So, How's Raya? Okay lar, but Raya doesnt seems like Raya to me..

But2!! 4S3 Jalan Raya was The BOMB! heh!

like finally ey we bonded. xD

Spend like the whole day till 12am with them.. cool!

BUt season 2 I join them late, for some apparent reasons. =.="

But Here's 4S3 Photo :

Bare with me the BIG PHOTOS! =.="

2010 Hari Raya

2010 Graduation Day

What else can I say? They're my awesome-ness Friends, Classmates, Second Family !! :D

haha!

Overall went for phy n chem paper.. Was manageable, but i was not in good shape for the first paper.. CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT??!?

wahh! Almost fainted for my first paper = BAD!

Was having MAJOR migraine.. WORST!

Art paper, didnt get to finish = DEAD MEAT i tell u..! T_T

Maths paper, Can can...first few pgs was easy, den came the middle Qns, STUCK seyy! Stupid hard qns... Unfortunately I was having Upset stomach...so, i couldnt think properly except for Puking that's stuck in my head.. GARH!

SICK at WRONG time! -.-"

Now art finish already! Wooots! CAN SLEEEP! like finally! haha!

But I still stress out..!

Not frgt to mention that after Nlvl I straight away join the ITE band.

My friends most going to find work, I cant... T_T

I'll be in and out of band, and even if i dun join them, I still can't coz my dad dun let me work..=.="

Stupid right, Some kids doesnt want to work coz lazy, but their parents force them to find their own money.. WHEREAS I want to go find jobs, my parents dun give.. to them, I'm still a kid. WTH! xP

IF IF IF, there is a job in teaching the band member music, with PAY, I want! But see how la my schedule is.. Gonna be damn tight..

(and they say, Nlvl is more stressing...) *sigh!*

ouhkay..End here..

Super darn tired. GOOD NIGHT Stalkers! xD

2010-10-02T15:28:00.001+08:00

NEXT TIME, BEFORE

PUTTING BLAME ON ME.

TELL PEOPLE THAT I'M A BAD PERSON.

GOSSIP ABOUT ME.

BELIEVE WHAT THOSE BITCHES SAID ABOUT ME.

STOP TRUSTING ME.

ACTING INFRONT OF ME.

PRANGAI BATU API.

HERE'S A TIP FOR YOU

-> GET YOUR FUCKING RESOURCES

RIGHT ABOUT ME

DEN YOU CAN SAY

WHATEVER YOU WANT ABOUT

ME, OKAY BITCHES?!

2010-09-18T20:34:00.007+08:00

will update soon. Upload soon.

Comp SOT DOT DOT!

Upload 5pics took 30mins of my life!

grr

2010-09-04T06:29:00.002+08:00

OMG!

Old pic sey! haha! Seriously found it in my FRIENDSTER!

Can u imagine that! my friendster havent been DELETED yet?!

WTF!

soo Ms JULIETFREAK found this photo..lol! hmm

Who's my Romeo? Dunnoe.. =)

Got my results slip , Prelims.

EMB3 = 17

But I hope it'll maintain!

ah! Nervous for my Eng paper on Wed!

Monday- MT paper

Tuesday - SS and mt LC.

garh!

Today going to library to mug my ass out!

Drilling all the essay into my freakishly weirdo head of mine.

Going alone (duh!)

got to know that Kay, Smallboy, Wan and Loyal Agitator going to lib at the same time also..

oh gosh!

Hopefully didnt bump into each other! xP

Agitator ask me to join in, I was like "hell no!"

Sume laki aku sorg ppn, kekek pe..=.=" Ramadhan oi. xD

Rumours and rumours and RUMOURS in class abt me and him, me and another him.

LOL! Lame sia srsly... :P

&& Thurs was the fun day!!

After sch, Fahna, Fatinah and I tied our bags together and carry each other..

was lame but FUNNY to the max! xDD

And I almost fell otw to the front gate, Fahna reaction was funny!

Coz if i fall, I'm pulling them along too! since our bags were tied up! xD

Yesterday Break Fast with Tiara, Aqidah and Fyka.

at KFC Fuchun CC..

Near our house mah!

We saw those angmohs from SAS.

I drool looking at the blonde hair guys and the tallest girl i've ever seen! :P

Seriously jakon! xD

And so, after we ate, we went to the playground behind Metta home.

Played the swing.

Saw the band peeps sec 3 and ranjan.

They hang around there, we 4 went off buy water.

Sit under Dahliah's block till 9.40pm

heh! Talk crap la we all..

Aqidah was tired. Poor thing...She just came back from Band..

So yea, yesterday was fub hanging out with them (:

Okay that's all..! today must springclean room 1st then off to lib.

(^_^)[V]

2010-08-29T01:27:00.001+08:00

bomb says:
OI! MAKCIK BELUM TIDUR LAGI?! hehe! HI!
I say:
OI OLD GINGER aka HALIA BUSUK! Kau pun samer kan!! and hello
xDDDDDDDDDDDD
bomb says:
eh! HAHHAHAHHA
I say:
halia busuk! xD no more annoying orange..!
lol!
hey Halia! asl asik muke masam je? Byk ANGIN nmpk!
HAHAHAH!
bomb says:
nah! I'm still annoying orange
hahahhaa
btw, ada real one orange in my kitchen....and kakak aku nye bilik ada langsir hitam...and everyday bilik kakak aku gelap...a good place for potato like you
you're muddy buddy!
I say:
hahaha!
aku pun ader big orange pt dapur
tapi...da BUSUK! serious!
xD
bomb says:
HAHAHAHAAHHA
I say:
so bru je tadi aku buang
bomb says:
OMG
I say:
xD
bomb says:
BOOOOOO
I say:
really does resembles u ah?
xDDD
MUAHAHAHAHHAH!
jkjk!
bomb says:
no the orange is my long lost friend! I've been searching for him for years
I say:
ouhh...its in the garbage...if u want, go search it..
xD
okay...today i'm evil...
sorry!
xDD
bomb says:
dah mati
hahhahaa
kau devil
you're evil potato!
I'll burn you under the sunlight
I say:
hahahaahah!!!
I'll SQUEEEEZE YOU! (okay, sounds wrong!)
xd
xD
bomb says:
HAHAHHA! no I'll spit seeds and orange juice at your face
I say:
LOL!
I'll spit mud all over u !
xD
bomb says:
and make you into french fries
I say:
lol!
oh well, at least I'm FRENCH..
HAHAHAH!!!
xD
bomb says:
HAHAHH! no you're not!
I say:
oh yes i am...
fry me and i'll be one HOT French babe!
xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
bomb says:
EEEEEEWWW! hahhahaha
dream on!
fahna pisang goreng...kau french fris
*fries
hmmm.....syaz ngn fyka....
I say:
syaz....celery?
fyka...pear!
haha!
coz pear is close to orange at times!
syaz maybe wasabi? haha! k i dunnoe
bomb says:
hahahahaha!
syaz celery pun best juga!
eh tak....she's pasta....pasta face! papapapa pasta face
I say:
xDD
lol!!
bomb says:
k tgh malam buta aku gula
eh
hahahahhaa
*gila
I say:
LOL!
kau gula! ah ye! kau GULA tiara
xDD
GULAAAAAA
bomb says:
hhahahahahaa
I and U buttons are quite far apart man
jari cramp skejap kot
I say:
awww...
obviously U cant press I....sakit nnti aku nie..xDDD
bomb says:
EEEEEEKKK
HAHHAHAAA
sounds so wrong
I say:
it is if u're think diff..
muahaha!
ok..aku nk tidur
bomb says:
hahahahahahaha
k goodnight muddy buddy!
I say:
me tired. go sleep. energy level UP!
xD
Gdnight Halia busuk(:

bomb says:

goodnight!

2010-08-29T00:44:00.003+08:00

Its 12am+ going to 1am.

And I'm not asleep yet. Gah! not tired ler!!!

=.="

I want hair like hers can????!!!

Can I rebond my fringe?!

Can I have wavy hair?!

I duwan Straight nor Curly but WAVY can??

ahhhhhhhhhhhh!

Well, mom decided NOT to rebond my hair. PHEW!

My hair dry want rebond can die sia!

Anyway...

Today break fast at my grandmother's house..

Love + hate it.

Why?

Love coz I get to see my little monkeys!

Hate coz my aunty tried to push the blame on my mom about some problems.

I was like in the middle of that "indirect verbal craps" btwn mom and aunt.

=.="

Shit la my aunt, don't like her from like I dunno how long alr.

Went home, restless..

den watch Ms Universe with mom

It was fun though.

We share common interest - Make up + judging their beauty/body.

Judging in a good way lah!

Though mom always hurt me verbally, tonight was atleast something to remember.

I really did try to share one of my problems with her.

And it really do make me feel better eventhough I share a little bits of it.

And I manage to get an approval from my mom (but not yet my dad)

to join the ITE Band after Nlvl.

Phew!

No I'm not going ITE..

just that I was invited to be the guest player.

BUT BUT BUT!!!
I havent get an update by Amin YET!

So if last minute no need, then i wont join lor.

if i get , then after Nlvl, gonna start heading to ITE Simei for practices till night..

okay that's all folks.

Bye STALKERS(:

2010-08-27T22:22:00.003+08:00

SOOO loving the soundtrack from one of the Japanese Anime "Howl's Moving Castle"..♥♥♥♥

Went to band and Mr Tan gave us this script... The melody is superb I tell you!

Hopefully no Piccolo part please!! lol! I sound bad. Bt I rather play FLUTE instead..SO NICE !!! argh! okay shut up Hanim.

But too bad can't stay that long.

Went home, nose bleed again ! ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

Pain sey.. T_T

okay next week gonna get report book.

Next week also gt teacher's day and Aces day together.

Boredom !

Sch ends 10am BUT BUT BUT the Sec4NA got Intensive Remedial.

=.="

SOCIAL STUDIES seyy! garh! Focus on SEQ. hate it much, but what the heck laaaa(:

Don't know why, but I just miss my friends. =/

hmm, maybe long time didn't hang out like we used to.

It sucks big time.

Faster lah Ms NLVL and Ms OLVL go awaaay laaah!

pfft!

Thought of going to library tomorrow but plan change again!

Parent's gonna go out from 11am-3pm++ to deliver their Kuih Raya to our customers.

So I have to stay at home to take care of my currently-sick bro.

Oh well, then tmr = Paranormal State Time!!! :D

anyway if I go library, haven't thought of who to tag along.

hrmm...want to change Blogskin but lazy.

Want to dispose my blog, but my heart not agreeing what my brain is thinking.

x.x"

Currently missing my two little monkeys of mine.

My little cute cousins lah! Natasha and Nadia!

Funny indeed, miss babysitting them while my parents and also their parents went out.

Miss listening to every baby words they say..but too bad I dun speak their language! haha!

(^_^)

K, I'll stop here.

☺Bye Stalkers.☺

2010-08-26T22:54:00.000+08:00

As soon as I realised I have to let it go
and the emotions I felt can't be forever hold
I cried all day and night unwilling to move on.
But I try to forget and make sure the memories are gone

However it hurts me more to see it coming
Hurt me suddenly till my heart is burning.
Hurt me deeper till I lose my grip
Killing me silently deep within.

Trying to recollect myself and heal this wound
Fake a smile and be happy soon.
Laugh out loud till my stomach ache
and stay this joyful, till it'll just make my day.

But Why am I the one who carrying this burden
For which it should be share with someone else.
Why am I feeling like a servant
to the one who's ego can't buy or sell.

I can't avoid nor put this problem to rest
I can't ask someone else to solve this mess.
I'm confuse and trap in this ugly test
of how much strength I have in me left.

Oh please oh please Just let it be
A one really bad and ugly dream.
Let all the nightmares be closely seam
Before it unravel and create another scene.

(Written by Hanim)

2010-08-26T20:02:00.003+08:00

okay.. first and foremost...

RYAN BUELL!!! RYAN BUELL!!!

Ahhhhhhhhh!

See! Watch Paranormal States alot of time, now I go crazy over....RYAN BUELL!

HAH! Irresistibly CUTE! xD

okayyy..

Haven't been blogging for quite sometime.

Monday , Tuesday I didn't come to school.

MC. Was sick.

and my nose bled for the first time in my entire 16years on Earth.

Quite pain aye.. Now just bled. Damn it my forehead pain.

=.="

Wednesday, came to school, loads of homework piled up before me last2 minute.

Sharill kept forgetting to tell me about homework..

haiyo! Old man already! lol!!

PE was definitely FUN! (weird..? lol! but FUN srs!)

we played Rugby...

Recess nothing to do, Played soccer.

The girls in the class just want to play soccer for fun la.

Obviously we all kaki bangku(dunnoe how to kick ball)

but that made the game interesting thou, we kick anyhow as long as we get the ball.

halfway thru, half of the malay s3 boys, Darren and Joshua joined in and play "monkey" with us.

I stop joining them and stand there like a statue in the middle of the field

because I don't feel like playing though.

But then the most memoriable part was when Fahna pushed Jani away, He "flew" away so damn funny sia! superb !

So after that, my nose bled lor, good thing it was abit. No one sees! PHEW!

Went band after school.

Forced myself to come for the sake of getting my embouchure back

for one of the big event which i wont write it out first.(:

okay...blah blah blahh...

TODAY!

Basically I cried hell lot of time.

Watertap season i guess.

Before sleep i cried, before going to school I cried, otw to school my fren ask me if i'm okay, i cried, after school i cried.

So yeaa..

my eyes swollen red already.

shits right? YES!

after school, Syaz wants talk to me.

Went under the block near cwp.

Shared our problems.

Basically, our problems were the same.

but I cried too much when I started adding the topic about my r/s with my parents currently.

At times okay. but one day we had an argument till mom called me Anak Derhaka.

T_T

I dunnoe what else to say but my heart was racing to a point whereby I lose grip on myself and now this is how weak I am.

Haish!

Do you know how hard it is to keep all the neg- emotions and

replace every one of it with a smile?

Basically, I'm lying to others including myself.

=.="

EEEE! Every problems are beginning to pile up !

I'm carrying the weight myself. sooner or later, I think I losing everything.

Sorry if it does gonna affect anyone.

=.="

Okayyyyyyyy.

Now got nothing to say.

Bye Stalkers.

2010-08-20T20:18:00.003+08:00

Currently SICK.

Had like 3 medicines in one go..BLUEKS!

2pills = torturing!

lol! i dun like pills! usually wen my mom not ard i just smash the pills into pieces and drank the powder instead. HAHA!

went to sch with slight feverish feeling, den I sit beside Sharill which is also sick.

He cough, I cough!

GREAT! den Shaf also sick! lol!

The weather was nice but too COLD!

been rainy the whole day.

When back home seeing starts already.

Mom forced me to drink 'air asam' - Traditional Medicine.

Drank that. Eat medi, den SLEEEEEEEP till buka..

Wah! my head still feel heavy.

GARH!

didnt go clinic coz.. my dad cant send me there coz his feet is swelling.

Anyway, my clinic is quite far.

eventhou there are lots of clinics nearby..

how to put this way .... hrmm :

SMRT assign all its staff members(+ related families) into certain clinic,

prices i think is lowered abit.

So my family ONLY reliable clinic is Lian Clinic lor.

(k, boring topic)

HAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA

2010-08-19T20:57:00.002+08:00

LOL! it's me ! :D

Okayy, currently feeling abit sickish alr..

argh!

Sorethroat esp! not my fav.. :P

Got back my papers alr..

well some uh.. MT and Geog and POA havent get!

ahhh!!

Overall, i did unexpectedly well..

2distinctions - Maths and Science.

Comb humanities- C5!! xP

Eng - I frgt.. ard 50++..

got this brochures from Polys..well the common ones like NYP, SP etc..

talking abt the course..

i took the Hospitality, Design and Engineering Courses - Brochures..

oh well..

YES YES YES I know, engineering sounds weird when it comes from a girl!

=.=.=.=.=.=.=.="""""""'

Engineering got girl inside wat! depending on which course i choose ler.

Hospitality - becoz gt Spa Management. I want. (:

but oh well, in the end, my eyes stick to :

SPACE & INTERIOR DESIGN.

Nice~~!

BUT BUT BUT!

I'll see how first.

My thoughts obviously change overtime, wont have high hopes abt it for now.

Next year I'll think about it again.

I wonder if it got Music bla bla bla Course?

Obviously got. but not favouring it .

I mean, I like those gig band or music composing thingy. doin all the music stuff in the comp.

But I guess I'm not into it compared to the triplets.

Well, diff people diff thoughts.

But my heart still sticks to music and band stuff.

:DDDD

This week LANGUOR to the max!

AHHH!

Once in awhile can play comp. now not that much.

Now also I touch my hp smtimes ..

Didnt have the energy to msg smtimes.

The whole daySSS I kept going home late despite finishing sch early(:

Always went to CDAC Library to finish my hmwk before heading home.

That's the good thing.

Bad thing : the aircon make me feel more lethargic!

heh!

ouh well.. atleast it's not tht pack!

last but not least.

Sry Qyda, cant follow u to the WGSB Concert, Busy as always. FOR NOW..

After N we'll meet ye.

Insya'ALLAH.(:

Bye stalkers!

(^_^)[V]

2010-08-13T21:55:00.003+08:00

Today went to band. Had to tune one by one.

2-3months of not touching my FLUTE.

Bad point. Coz went its my turn to tune, I CAN'T BLOW!

I was like "alamak! no sound? shoot shoot shoot! =.=" *phuu phuu phuuuuu*"

Mr Tan was like showing the "OMG!" Face.

Some of the bandmates, my sec4s esp was like looking at me shockingly.

wahh! Sian~~!

After a few try, then can. *PHEW!!* luckily!

But i was damn flat on my flute.. garh! I hate it went it comes to exchanging Piccolo and Flute everytime. Makes my embouchure hard to adjust it. Especially when it's like a few months not playing them! =.="

Mr Pulut and Mr Pig will forever be my Hubby and Scandal! :D

Kept listening to Requiem of Tower - Escala quite a number of times.

Addicted to the song already. lols!

Especially I'm currently Angry Angry Angry, listen to "Angry" Song also lor. :D

Okay. Major Headaches GO AWAAAYYY PLEASE! You're making me seeing doubles and losing my balance quite aloooot of times already. Damn you headaches! Syaz! HELP! I need ur wonderful massaging hands to massage away my headaches! Must must must! haha! saja je aku nie xD lols!.

Saturday Night Studying is no more already. Why? Coz....now....

My....CURFEW....Shifted.....To.....4pm! OMG! soooo early!

So have to be back home by 4pm to help mom cook for Buka.

lols! Some more. My "Studying time" was 4pm-8pm. lols!

Nvm. Can stay home and study right. I hope. =|

WAHHH! My POA TEACHER LIKE WTH WTH WTH!

She divide our class in group 1 and 2. No one knows why lor. She never tell us. But we all guess la that Group 1 are most probably the ones who passed their Poa paper.

I made it to Group 1. I didn't bother that much.

She gave us works to do. Which is, for my group, POA TYS topic 13-16 and 20-22. by next Friday. Crazy? YEA.

Group 2 diff story. They must passed up 2-3 topics on selected days.(I think)

So I did my usual stuff, doing POA with a CONFUSE face as usual. Whatever qns Sharon asked me, I asked Wuxin.(:

den Mdm Ng came to my table. Asked for my pencil. Take my POA Textbook. Write something and showed to me to read it.

She wrote :

Poa -> Nlvl GRADE 1

Olvl A2

That's her freaking expectations on me!?!?!? WTH WTH WTH WTH!!

I was like "WHat! NO WAY! I always got straight F9 for poa, Don't la 'cher!"

She was like "Say YES, I don't care. Say Yes!"

I give in and say YES.

DAMMIT! How can a straight F9 Poa girl(me) make it to a big jump for grade 1 for NLVL!?

Wah siaoo! But have to ler. Just have to try. I nvr know how it'll turn out anyway. but trying doesnt hurt right?(:

IF IF IF IF....I didnt pass my POA, Next year I want to drop out from POA.

BUT BUT BUT....I can't say much now even if I fail or pass coz it's also up to my dad's and teachers approval. Darn it. If possible, I want to drop that subject. hrmmm.

SEE HOW LA. Maybe, Yes, NO.

OKAY GTG! BYE STALKERS!

Too tired alr!

(^_^)[V]

2010-08-11T21:52:00.003+08:00

WHEEE~~~

I love PUASA!

I dunnoe why. But I just love Puasa(:

First period just now was Physics. Why am I telling you that?

Well, I get 18/20 for my MCQ Phy Prelim Paper!

But only that paper la! Paper 2 haven't received yet.

Hope for the best (:

MT lesson was fun with the girls joking ard before the boys enter the class.

And Aidil and Afiq irritating prangai really did entertain me.

Afiq the blurr2 one who just agree to what I say(sometimes!)

Aidil the so-called "Singer" BESIDE me. Translating the National Day songs into Malay Version.

LOL! TOTAL FAILURE SIA!

And TOTALLY FUNNY!

lols!

Okay skip skip skip.

Went home straight.

Wasn't feeling well.

-Major Headaches.

-Backbone hurts like crap!

- My right foot still pain. + i think its swelling abit. =|

It was raining cats and dogs! (lols)

SUPER DARN HEAVY

that my shoes was like tsunami inside.

Srsly wet like craps..=.="

Almost reached home until an old lady called me and ask me to send her to the nearest bus stop

and also to shelter her since she has no umbrella.

Her leg was injured which causes her to hold my arm REALLY DAMN TIGHT!

Pain laa! I was like *bite my lips!* "Tahan Hanim.."

lols!

One point when we were crossing the road,

She stopped in the middle of the road.

I was like omg! CARS CARS CARS!!

and say "Aunty come we walk faster. Lai lai.."

She was like "leg pain leg pain. Aunty cannot tahan already"

Almost scared the shit out of me when a car just past right at my butt.

Nicely done it aye aunty.

As soon as we reached to the bus stop infront of Fuchun Sec,

Her Warm "Thank You girl2, lu byk tlg aunty. Aunty ble naik bus. Thank you"

And that sort of made me SMILE to the fullest!

(^_^)[V]

Helping an injured old lady and shelter her to safety on the first

day of Puasa really did make me smile the whole day(:

They Make My Life Go WEEEE!!! <3

Love them LOADS!

This was taken during our school's 10th yr Anniversary.

Yeap, was about 9pm+++ waiting for the ending of the school's concert(:

Soon, Fyka(beside me) will leave school to Poly.

Then it'll be the five of us.

OMG! Time really do fly fast right?

Dunnoe why.

But I suddenly miss my fren who died young..=.="

Ntah asal. Just had a feeling or flashback of her last night just brought me to tears.

Though it may be quite a loong time, FRIENDSHIP never ends be it from "two sides" of the world.

OKAYY...to tired already OMG!

=.="

GOOD NIGHT STALKERS!

|Ouh and All the best on ur DNT Journal Retarded! Jiayou! You can do it!(: |

2010-08-10T19:16:00.002+08:00

TIRED AS USUAL.

Puasa esok!

Den tmr got PE..=.="

What the flute!

2010-08-09T22:14:00.002+08:00

These question never fails to bug me every time.

"Why am I single?"
"Why did I kept rejecting guys?"

"What am I looking in a guy to impress me?"

My answers?

He's the reason why I lose trust on guys.

The reason why it's hard for me to accept guys.

Though how far or near.

How Nice or Bad.

How Stupid or Smart.

How Young or Old.

the guy can be.

I am faithful. Always be.

But if a guy likes me for pleasure.

Why should I give that chance to him?

I maybe crazy/unrealistic/full of nuisance(you name it) but it's my choice.

And if a friend is to be jealous why I can easily make a guy like me.

She is definitely wrong.

I talk to him(s) as who I am and I don't have the intention to flirt with them.

You are always jealous of me. Why? Because of the attention I get from guys.

You told me that.

I wasn't angry nor sad, but disappointed.

A friend who I trust a lot and dearly, was jealous of me.

If you want guys so much, make a move. You sounds despo.

I didn't reject guys.

I just don't have the time to contribute the "amount of love" to "him".

No I'm not using crappy typical "old-school" reason :

"The need to focus on studies"

That's NOT my reason.

It's just that I'm always busy. If I were to be free, it'll be for a few min or hours.

I'm not like any other girls who can stay out for as long as I want to.

I got curfew.

I got crazy, over-protective parents who sets more rules to me.

They are traditional parents still.

But I love them because they still care (in a strict way that is =.=")

and YES I am afraid of them.

Unlike some child who doesn't, I still do.

Hence, I rather NOT take the risk to let my parents ( my DAD esp) to find out about my r/s with some guy.

If not :

My life lies on the thin line, one wrong moves, it'll break and I'm DEAD.

Who I like? No one.

I think.

I'm unsure for sure! :D

What type of guy I am looking for?

No Idea.

A guy with enough balls to really convince me to be his gf even if it'll takes years to impress me?

haha!

Anyway, I'm, too, unsure of it either. Depends on the situation I guess?

I'd been with | had "somewhat" unofficial r/s with :

A playboy
A Pornfreak
A Biker
A Gangster
An Ah-beng
A Matrep.
A Smarty-pants.

(You name it!)

And what is missing in these points?

A NORMAL GUY.

LOL!

So? Who is that normal guy?

For me....TO FIND OUT !

☺

I may have blogged about this topic before.

But What the heck, Just blog again la :P

OI!

Tmr puasa la!

we got a few hours to spat Vulgarities before the Holy Month steps in!

LOL! that's what Retarded told me just now! Damn you! Shit YOU! :P

lol! jkjk! (:

Kalau maki dalam Bulan Puasa, DOSA TAU!!

Batal Puasa tau!!

Uztaz cakap, Tak baik maki2 atau makan dalam diam2, Kiteorg tak nmpk,

Tapi Tuhan nampak tauuu!!

hahahah!!

OKAY!

HERE's my Vulgarities.

MFCBCIAB!

whats that?

MOTHER

FUCKING

CIBAI

BASTARD

CELAKA

IDIOT

ASSHOLE

BITCH

Nice right the acronym?

It all started during sec 2..was trying to remember the chem thingy 10mins before common test.

Syaz was trying her best to remember this : Fluorine, Chlorine, Bromine.

Den I looked at her, Alah ! Remember je FUCKING CIBAI BASTARD!

then that's how we remembered the ans UP TILL NOW...xDDD

LOL!

LAME right? right? RIGHT?!

den CIA was the shirt use by Hajar's ex.

And we all hated him when he hurt Hajar's feelings.

So I came out with the vulgar : Celaka Idiot Assholes!

NICE RIGHT?!

lol!

nehh, lame as usual.

But hey. It's fun to be creative and it's the Creativity that made it fun!

I AM SOOOOOO PISSED OFF FOR SURE!

Yesterday my Pink Earpiece Spoilt!!

NOW : MY Pink Wallet got holes! WHAT THE PIaNK !!

Seriously so down sey!

No, I'm not pink freak!

I just happens to have more pink stuffs since BIRTH!

So it really represents me a lot

NOT as a girly girl la!

Just the personality.

But I have enough savings to buy new wallet la.

how much is enough?

$48

teehee!

And why I told someone not enough?

Neh, I didn't lie.

I use my savings for emergency purpose.

Not for my desires that is.

what's more important? WALLET!

Coz it is where I can put money in it!

Earpiece can wait long2..in a month time.

T_T

I hate you August for burning out my PINKS

x.x"

okay I think that is all I can say!

I'll end here.

BYE STALKERS!

[V](^O^)[V]

2010-08-08T11:46:00.002+08:00

|Looking back. Endless memories in a Photograph.|

|Come Back. Wishing for another day with you.|

Ain't Danboard so adorable! :D

Oh well.. Wake up in the morning and start to help mom baking cookies for her customer.

Was obviously tired yesterday till I fell into a very deep sleep on the couch after watching engineering stuff in Discovery Turbo Channel.

was so engrossed watching how they fix the cars and how machine works(:

too bad it's a male-dominated career T_T

I want I want I want!!

But mom want me become.....lol! That's for me to know for you to find out.

What I can hint is : GIRLISHHHH Stuff =.="

Okay. have loads of cookies to bake.With only two people doing it, which is me and mom only.

Sis cant help, she's working day in and out. Anyway, baking not her forte.

Its MINE! haha!

Freaks! My "sick" terrapin was actually pregnant! No wonder she doesn't want to eat!

Now separating her into another box.

Expecting her to "be in labour" in one-two weeks time coz she's starting to do that "kick" at her tail. haiyooo!! This is gonna be super "stress".

Okayy.

Today's post is short and simple.

Gotta go off and put Choco on every 900 pieces of unbaked cookies.=.="

Anything MSG me! I will reply for sure coz I'M BORED!

Bye Stalkers!

(^_^)[V]

2010-08-06T21:54:00.008+08:00

BOO!!!

HEY HEY HEY!

LONG TIME NO "BLOGGED"! :D

Oh well, havent update my blog for like about a month. Been busy with prelims.

Thought I can do well in prelims, but I doubt so. Coz I somehow screwed up big time for my POA Paper 2 and my Combine science. =.="

Heard that next week we're gonna get back our papers. OH SHOOT! Hopefully I'll pass. xP

No confidence that I can get distinctions thou, but at least 60+ is enough for me(:

So hrmm, Life hasnt been easy for me. Was stress here and there. Mainly because of Nlvl Coursework. That just wrecked my entire freedom! =.= Fortunately, I managed to finish it yesterday! FUH! But I thought that was last, then realise we got Nlvl Art Paper 2. Gonna get new topic and have to start all over! Finding pictures, sketch all bla bla bla! OH GOD! I think by the end of Nlvl , there's gonna be a "HUGE BAGS" under my eye! =.="

BUT STILL, I never regret taking art. My forte. So dun come to me and say "you should join F&N or D&T" !=.=" I'm not good in cooking nor be independent in drilling woods etc. (:

Hrmm, other than school...well, I did went on "Evening-Night" Studying at the Library with Retarded, and once with Qydah tagging along, every Saturday. and after 4hr of intense studying, went blankly in the night slacking for awhile. (: It was MOST CERTAINLY fun. Dont know why, but I can remember what I study at night but not during the day :/

During the intense month, wasnt really looking forward into working hard to pass. Rather slack coz of some people who kept demoralising me. felt less motivated and pressured =.="

But I have my Motivators♥‼
TYVM peeps! (:

☺ Shouldnt have gone so far without You(s) ☺

Today had our Annual Cross-Country and also NDP celebration in school. It was okay I guess..(:
but I sprain my ankle(somehow) now going around at home limping like Mas Selamat. xDD
Mom was abit irritating at first but she told me to soak my feet into a pail of hot salt water. IT WAS AWESOME and NICEEE!! (: hehe! I'm still limping though but I'm fine(:

OhhhhKAY!

Watch The Last Airbender... Ratings? ZERO !

OMG! I rather watch the cartoon then this! Too much cutting that REALLY made me CONFUSE big time! watched halfway then close. Cheat my feeling only. Wahh! Sokka was supposed to be funny, But in that movie, he's always so serious, eventhough it was played by Jackson Rathbone , the "hotstuff in Twilight as Jesper!..but still! He's really not the Sokka type, he's more like Zuko, and Zuko's cast will be much better off played as Sokka! wahh!
Okay, I bet some will be like "ah? wtf is Hanim talking about?!" lol! If you're the Avatar Legend of Aang Fan, You'll know(:

If not, You wasting your 3mins reading this paragraph! :P teehee!

My Prep work! - Researches.

Sketches♥

Dev Layout 1 - Shattered Rose.

Dev Layout 2&3 - Flowers in the Frames, Shattered Masks.

Colour Tests

♥TA-DAAA♥

Though it wasnt my best, but I'd tried(: Wasnt easy though. Blending of COLOURS was like shitzxzxzx!! oh well, its over now. I'm Happy! :D

Lastly , I ♥ this song(:

ENJOY!!

"How did we ever come to this

I never thought you'd be
someone I'd have to miss
and there I was caught in your game
needing answers that never came
and we took a chance,
you said you were strong
strong enough
but you were wrong...

CHORUS:
and now I'm...

Deafened by your silence
blinded by the tears
if you're looking for forgiveness
you won't find that here
cause you lied your way to heartbreak
and now its all too clear
that you will never be....

Look at her
she won't ever compare
you can say you're sorry
but I still don't care
was she worth this mess
was she worth this pain
you can say it's her fault
but you're both to blame

...Now I'm ....

CHORUS

Looking back it was all so easy
I hope you know you're my last mistake
Don't come around and say you need me
I won't stay

Now I know that you were so deceiving
was it fun for you to walk away
I hope you liked it
cause she's so damn easy
you won't change

CHORUS

That you will never be......"

hrmm.. I guess that's all folks!
Goodnight Readers/Stalkers!

2010-07-09T23:22:00.001+08:00

BLOG

HIATUS

...

2010-06-25T22:15:00.003+08:00

hrmm....Today is Hajar's bday. Happy Sweet 16th Birthday Sweetie! Love you always!! xDD

Currently, my friends are having fun at ECP ... Gosh! too bad I'm stuck at home. T_T

Anyway, to keep myself busy. Just gonna some crappy survey call 100 Truth about me. =.="

WHAT WAS YOUR:
1. Last beverage: Blueberry
2. Last phone call: Fyka
3. Last text message: Tiara
4. Last song you listened to: Bad day
5. Last time you cried: err..last two wks?

HAVE YOU EVER:
6. Dated someone twice: haha! gt.
7. Been cheated on: YES! DEFINITELY! ALWAY!S TWICE! THRICE! AND STILL COUNTING MY DEAR. =.="
8. Kissed someone & regretted it: Yeaps. after that incident, I nvr let any guy kissed my lips, dun care if his my bf :P
9. Lost someone special: hrmm, lost sm1? yeahh, Twice bt I wasnt close to him and her.
10. Been depressed: hah..! Yeahh
11. Been drunk and threw up: eek. hell no.

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
12. White
13. Pink
14. Blue

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: (2010)
15. Made a new friend: yeap, Retarded(hello!)
16. Fallen out of love: uh? maksud?
17. Laughed until you cried: Duh.
18. Met someone who changed you: Yeap
19. Found out who your true friends were: Yes yes YES.
20. Found out someone was talking about you: YEAP!
21. Kissed anyone on your friend's list: nope.
22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: Numerous.
23. How many kids do you want: lol ! at most 3.
24. Do you have any pets: yeap, 4 Cute Terrapins! (:
25. Do you want to change your name: Used to, bt nehh..
26. What did you do for your last birthday: Understanding. Coz my personality are versatile. =.="
27. What time did you wake up today: 9am
28. What were you doing at midnight last night: Webcamming
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for: Ending N and Olvl Exams ONCE AND FOR ALL !!!
30. Last time you saw your Mother: A few mins ago(:
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: Control my emotions?
32. What are you listening to right now: When I look at you - Miley (COVER version) =D
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Tommy gt. Tom, nvr.
34. Who's getting on your nerves right now: Boy Crazy.
35. Most visited webpage: Facebook/Blogger.
36. Whats your real name: Hanim Binte NAMA BAPAK AKU ! :D
37. Nicknames: JulietFREAK, MF.
38. Relationship Status: Single as always my dear(:
39. Zodiac sign: Taurus
40. Male or female: Female duh!
41. Primary School: Woodlands Primary
42. Secondary School: Marsiling Secondary
43. High school/college:-
44. Hair colour: Black and some highlights of brown dry hair. haha!
45. Long or short: SHORT!(:
46. Height: 156.(:
47. Do you have a crush on someone: Maybe..
48: What do you like about yourself: hrmm, my ugly faces I made to make my friends go eeek! hehe!
49. Piercings: a pair(:
50. Tattoos: none
51. Righty or lefty: Righty

FIRSTS :
52. First surgery: none
53. First piercing: When I was a baby.
54. First best friend: Aqidah.
55. First sport you joined: Floorball.
56. First vacation: KL.
58. First pair of trainers: dunnoe

RIGHT NOW:
59. Eating: Chilli Crab! (:
60. Drinking: Blueberry Syrup.
61. I'm about to : Do homework.
62. Listening to: Song
63. Waiting for: Retarded finishing game, I think.

YOUR FUTURE :
64. Want kids: Who wouldn't want.
65. Get married: Duh.
66. Career: I got alot to think about for now, my dear. (:

WHICH IS BETTER :
67. Lips or eyes: Eyes
68. Hugs or kisses: Hugs
69. Shorter or taller: Taller
70. Older or Younger: Depends
71. Romantic or spontaneous: Romantic
72. Nice stomach or nice arms: Both?
73. Sensitive or loud: sensitive
74. Hook-up or relationship: relationship.

HAVE YOU EVER :
76. Kissed a stranger: Never
77. Drank hard liquor: Never
78. Lost glasses/contacts: Yeah
79. Sex on first date: Nope
80. Broken someone's heart: Yes
82. Been arrested: Nope, I gd girl! hahaha!
83. Turned someone down: yeah
84. Cried when someone died: duh.
85. Fallen for a friend: Yeah.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
86. Yourself: 50-50 I think
87. Miracles: maybe
88. Love at first sight: neh.
89. Heaven: Duh.
90. Santa Claus: Nope.
91. Kiss on the first date: Nope, You wasting your time doin that if he left you after that.
92. Angels: Yeap.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time: If I alr have a bf, I won't cheat on him lah! =.=" Only that GUY did. Fcuk!
95. Did you sing today: LOL ! Nehh...dun feel like it.
96. Ever cheated on somebody:Nope.
97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go: Not sure. Hmm, Sec 1? coz that's the yr I did ALOT of mistakes =.="
98. The moment you would choose to relive: uh? dunnoe.
99. Are you afraid of falling in love: haish...yes. always am.. =.="
100. Are you afraid of posting this as 100 truths: Nehh..dun mind at all.

hrmm....Too bad Jake Campbell quit Alesana. AWWW!!! Gonna miss him.

Like how I used to miss Huck! Still remember how coincident it is when I was doing one crappy dance that was actually same as how Huck did!! hehe!

And that I always like to fight(play2 only) with Tiara or mostly Fyka.

Then Coincidently, Jake also likes to carik psl! hahaha! aww! he's cute.

And now, Alex Torres! ooo! got a Latin Husband!! Olah me Amigo ! Te amo !!! xDD

as I was browsing thru his pic, and hey COINCIDENCE again sia!!!

Our fringe currently same, My fringe ystrday was like some crappy emoshit (coz I cut wrongly =.=") and turns out to be the same as him!

But mine a bit shorter lah.

anyway, he's cute. So who cares! hahaha!!

Ouh, previously, i gt tell Tiara one funny stuff.

okay, One time, in the art room, it was raining, and I was darn bored at that time, And trying my best to entertain myself by just humming this two words : DU DU

then suddenly Lightning Strike!! LOL!

so its like ,

I sing : Du du *BOOM! LIGHTNING STRIKE!*

HAHA! damn funny!

then just a few days ago, it was raining heavily, and as usual I was at Tiara's hs with Syaz,Fyka and Shaf.

and IF I'm not wrong we were browsing thru Alesana's video.

So while it load, as usual, trying to kill boredom by humming and I go

singing : La la la *BOOM! LIGHTNING STRIKE!*

I pause for a moment, giggle. den again

Sing : laaa *FLASHES OF LIGHTNING! Oh c'mon! I can't sing?!

The rest laugh hysterically !!

grr! haha!

Den I told Tiara the next day in the msn.

Hanim : When I sing, got lightning. adoi! Then Imagine if I were to have Concert solo. Then when I sing for the 1hour Concert, I think it'll be RIBUT TAUFAN siot! LOL! Pity my Fans who's gonna be spinning ard with the tornadoes while I sing. HAHA!!

Tiara : Oh no! Then I wont be going to your concert then!! I will be sacrificing my life sey!

Hanim : Hahaha!!! Come lahh, U'll get free ride on the TORNADOES ! haha! We barely have it in ANY CONCERT you know, except mine ! haha!

LOL ! A funny convo. xD

2010-06-24T11:49:00.002+08:00

ah! I keep on overcharging my hp, sooner or later it gonna spoil.

Which it does coz my hp keeps on shutting off by itself or in "static" thingy!

darn it. but like the hp though, slim = easy to put in pocket(duh!)

Speaking of which, Dad offer me to use Line instead of ppd

and also change hp to Blackberry.

it was actually his hp, but he hates using it coz keypad too small fr his fat thumbs! lol !

But i reject though.

Lines to easy for my dad to STALK into my "mobile life"

I know him to well alr.

so yea, sticking to ppd even though ppd is still low! =.="

grr!

Topping up next mid-mth. aick!

lamer dok!

WOOTS to Glee ep 20 ! go GAGA over it!

Tmr cant go Hajar's Bday party at ECP .

mom dun give. Freaks!

=.="

so just gonna wish her through hp. (:

2010-06-23T22:59:00.004+08:00

Heather Morris!

She's the best dancer in GLEE!

love her bimbo-act in that show especially when she said :

Do you know dolphins are just GAY Sharks??

Hahahaha! so darn bimbo + cute + funny !!

Christina Grimmie !!

She's sooo damn TALENTED.

Have a powerful voice and can PLAY PIANO !!

I like her hair and her eyes too!

Admire her video that I've just uploaded in facebook.

WAYYYYYY better than miley's songs.

I was like, "need to upload it so badly!!"

Which I managed to upload already, since I have Youtube Downloader, weee~~!

Senang sikit, if not I keep on disturbing my friends to upload for me. haha!

I LOVE CHRISTINA GRIMMIE !! WOOTS!!

Jake Campbell !!

Ain't he HOT??!?!?!

Again, thanks to the girls, I go drooling over him again ! hehe!

Watched Alesana went tour with FFG.

Super darn funny seyy they all.

And jealous much that they get to go around the world !! grr!

I like the part where they went to Finland(if I'm nt wrong),

Dennis and Jeremy was like "We're on the boat motherF, on the Boat motherF"

funny sey aha! =)

Then me and Tiara was like bored at the moment after watching it

and we were like "hey, lets take random vid la"

then it turns out to be the one below :

sorry can't see us, try guess which one is which aites!

hehe!

Fyka wasn't in atm, coz she was at Johor yesterday.

Camerawoman : JOHN FINA !! hehehe!

Okay, nothing to say.

Good night Readers/Stalkers!

2010-06-22T21:15:00.002+08:00

Wahh...so tired. =.="
This morning I woke up from sleep in the middle of the morning, 2AM !! wahh!

Just because I had a bad dream, but somehw i frgt it, n because of that, I woke up.=.="
and then cant slp back. adoi ! I kept tossing and turning myself on the bed then no choice but just to drink smthg and stretched a little, then try slpg again. =.=" Unfortunately, I stare into black space fr 2hrs, at ard 5 am I fell aslp. walao ! Then went fr remedial looking sooo super tired! walao! =.="

So today, had a gd jolly time goofing with Tiara and joking2 with Shaf. =)

YES ! tmr I can start to PAINT !!! =)

K cant blog much now. Busy and Tired .

So Gd NIGHT Readers/Stalker ! =)

Tmr wanna OBSERVE Mr Retarded if possible. his flag day mah.. haha!

2010-06-18T15:14:00.004+08:00

Wow... I was actually reading a book..? weird. I hate reading. but this book was very much inspiring and related to real life at times. =)

I read it in the internet, much like an E-Book like that. The title was "I believe you".

Unfortunately, it only give a sneak preview of Chapt 1 - 11 only. The remaining chapters they can't show it, must buy through internet since it wasn't sold in bookstores yet. =.="

WTH! I want to know what happened next sey!!!! Already at sub-climax and then halfway through, can't read. ler...

It was about a girl, Joanna and a guy, Jacky. They were from same JC and class.

Joanna hates Jacky for the fact that his immaturity causes Joanna to feel agitated most of the time.

Joanna is an introvert person, who always distance herself from everyone and often thinks negative.

Jacky, in other hand, was a bubbly guy with full of hilarious jokes. He was always fond of Joanna from the beginning of their school period.

Knowing of Joanna's OCD, Jacky never fails to help Joanna and change her for the better, which led them to a shrink, or psychiatrist.

Joanna was very much a hot-headed type of person and Jacky loves to give her jokes despite being given a lot of warnings to stop from her.

Jacky always stay by her side, through thick and thin, even when she burst into flame, Jacky believes she will change into someone better.

Jacky likes her but never tell her about it.

Joanna's feelings beginning to grow as chapter of their lives move forward.

It was very much sweet of Jacky though. (: To read 11 chapt of it, just to get a taste of the teenagers' lives, click the link : I believe you

End~ (^_^)[V]

2010-06-18T11:40:00.002+08:00

Trying to remember back what songs I have previously played from sec 1 till now.

Since I'm bored. zzz..

Rushing on my third colour test!! ARGH!!

I wanna paint on MONDAY!! ahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cold morning again coz raining. =) AnD WEN CAN MEET AQIDAH seyy? this week I can't o out. Next week I'm gonna be busy followed by the rest of the week/months! =.="

Aqidah plan to save money to go Aus to meet Ain. I was tagged along BUT the problem is, like as if my parents give only. T_T"

Kalau nk gi town, dorg da kecoh, apetah gi Aus. =.=" Planning to save as much by next year after Olvl, den if can go, then I go, If not, zzzz!!!!

Ain say she can drive us everywhere. WOW! Lucky here, Aus = 16yr old can drive already. ours = wait long long..! haha!

I'll just have to pray hard that I can go. I really wanna go!!! But one problem, I scared of flights. =/ Can be paranoid at times. =.="

2010-06-16T22:50:00.003+08:00

I seriously have no life, I've been taking all this Facebook Quizzes the whole night. hahas!

One of the Quiz, actually some of it are rather true (: Two thumbs up for that(:

One of it is : What animal best represents me = EAGLE
"Your spirit takes the form of an eagle - agile, strong, and independent. Eagles are dreamers with strong aspirations and even stronger determination to accomplish these goals. They aren't always that social, often preferring to stay independent to their own self although the few friends of an eagle always have someone to lean on and trust when they need. Someone with an eagle personality is quick to dream and yet quick to hide from others: they can conceal their emotions very well from others. Despite this, they do carry many emotions within them. It is hard to gain the trust and friendship of an eagle, but it is also very worthwhile. They carry hidden talents and strength that others may not see unless their eyes are talented enough to see through the mask that eagles often will wear. Eagles are strong and loyal lovers, but often careful and cautious about relationships. Looking into the eyes of an eagle, you will see a hard shell at first but deep down there is a well of emotion and dreams as well as strength. In times when your dreams seem too far to reach, listen to the wind in the trees and look up to the example of the high flying eagles soaring above the rest and remember that there is always hope."

soo true liao. hmm, I got nothing to say about this. (:

What Do Dreams Trying to tell me : I'm Depressed. (LOL!)
"You're dreams are almost always so real that you don't know if you dreamt it or not. Your mind is working so hard to sort through all that is bothering you. Your dreams are about your family or friends and things that are actually happening in your life... just with a crazy twist that leaves you even more confused."

The Dream I had usually confuses me a lot. I always thought I wasn't dreaming, but then at times also I thought as if it's like a DeJa Vu..

At times I dreamed that I msg a friend something important, and as soon as I woke up, I thought I had already msg her, but then a few hours later, realising she didn't msg me back, Check my "sent msges" inbox, no sign of that msg. LOLS! make me shiok sendiri for that hours. wth!! hahahahaa!

2010-06-16T15:42:00.002+08:00

Wow...Morning = COLD !

Coz its been raining cats and dogs the whole morning. Making my room darker and colder and soo COMFY ! makes me wanna cuddle in the bed with my blanket and pillow.. =))

Unfortunately, the running water is soo cold too and my water heater spoilt already, zz..

But the continuous raining causes Orchard Road FLOODED! pity Starbucks, Mcd and many underground stores were washed up ! oooo! kesian..

My aunty was also trap in the taxi, the water was gushing into the taxi...but lucky she got off as soon as possible. (:

Woah, 1+ wk more to school. oh great(sarcasm)...

2010-06-13T20:34:00.004+08:00

Today...well basically,

I'm HAPPY !!

why? Nehh, just spent time with my family from 10am - 7pm+ outside home !!

hehe! Went picnic with them at East Coast and the first 1hour was damn hot. Mom Fell down at the pavement after acting like Matrix. HAHAHA! I tell you, its super funny !!!! hahah!

Suddenly, it get worser, the wind was damn HARD...I'd tell you this : among all my family, I was the only one who kena BLOW AWAY by the STRONG WIND...HAHAHAHAH!

Tu lahh! Light sgt! xDDD hahaha! I was standing facing the direction of the wind, the wind blows towards me, and I was pushed to the back. HAHA! My sis was like LMAO all the way.. xDD

Then I just hid behind a pole, where the strength of the wind isnt that high. haha! Laugh all you want when you read this. Coz I'm laughing too . (:

But then. the wind was darn too strong till it wrecked up my eardrums, I was literally "deaf" for a moment. The pressure just pushed my eardrums..YIKES! Pain.

Then after that, went back to our tent, sit for awhile, my parents sat at the bench further away from me and my siblings. While they spend their quality time together, Me and my sis just talk about...err..GUYs? haha! Typical Girls mahh.. And Singing our lungs out.. while my bro isolate himself in the tent and playing his PSP.. (:

So, around 4pm, my family pack up and went to the other side of EC to meet my aunty and her family. Coincidently they were there.. Meet and talk as per normal. Sis blanja me ICE CREAM COOKIE MONSTER !! My fav..!! xD TYVM SIS!!

Then layan my baby cousins for awhile. GOOD THING I didnt bring my guitar. If not, they'll be banging on it. haha!

After that went back home, slept all the way in the van. I was literally having car sick atm.. PLUS the sick in my stomach .. eek! Good thing I didnt puke. haha!

Skali, dad made a pit stop at Botak Fav near WDP.. Sis treat everyone .. Imagin THREE Fish and Chips and TWO Chicken with Cheese cost $42.00 !!! EXCLUDING drink you know.. adoi ! MAHAL..BUT YUMMY !!!! Serious. must try..!! Near CWP only.. =D

MUST TRY UH ! IF NOT, I KILL YOU! haha! k lame.. =.="

Reached home at about 7pm+, mom made a pitt stop to buy bbt. ADOI !

Now at home. Satisfied, coz I gobble up every meat I saw on the plate just now. Since yesterday I eat abit. Today I force myself to eat.

Here are the pics.. Enjoy while it last!

Well, Here you can see how strong the wind is.

The trees tilt towards us. Scary.

O.o"

LAST NIGHT at Jetty WaterFront with my Family.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Office Buddies

Gay Zombies

Annoying Room-mate

Well, After watching Annoying Room mate. Fyka was trying to re-enact the scene just to annoy Poor Tiara who is trying to sleep! haha! Kesian.

Then Fyka was pushed by Tiara till she drop flat onto the wall then on the floor! haha! super funny ! =D

2010-06-12T15:20:00.006+08:00

My Cousins with my guitar.

At Tiara's Hs, super darn bored, so take a pic. =P

LOL! from top, My Bro, Me and my Sis !

Super old sey this pic, found it at my Grandparents' hs..

My Nlvl Colour Test (:

This one old pic.. Now Halfway thru gonna finish.

Damn the Gold Colour pencil!

When I colour it, it turns into dark dirty green. Haiyooo =.="

So Today I can't go out for Morning Run/Walk..pfft!

Woke up at 8am, Darn it, Had a Major Headache. =.="

Want to get off from bed, then started to see double and feel heavy,

so went back to sleep.

zzzz!

I thought I had a fever or something , but it turns out, ntg. O.o"

Later was awaken by my mom's SCREAM! ugh! I hate it when she do that.

Seriously make me jump up from bed.

Been having headache for the past few DAYS.

Breathing Difficulties for the past few MONTHS.

Backbone is in pain from Time to Time.

WHEN you put all of this together.

Suffer these pains altogether.

It's like a Gateway to Hell, I tell you.

T_T

Told mom, She thought I was imagining it,

FREAKS la! who wanna imagine it...

Had a nightmare, three times.

wow. Sad and scary at the same time.

Scary, is normally ...NORMAL(duh!) for nightmares.

Sad, well I don't wish to elaborate on that, cause it somehow made me cry.

That dreams was so VIVID and so REAL, even when I talk to that person,

it's like I having a real convo with that person.

Who is that person, well...SOMEONE =(

I remember walking into a room, saw two unexpected pictures, so real(again)

and then that person...well.....basically, something sad happen.

And hell yeah, I cried in my dream and also when I woke up in the middle of the night crying unexpectedly. =.="

pfft!

feeling sick to my stomach right now.

Skipping lunch. Don't feel like eating.

Mom say I look sick and lose weight fast nowadays.

WHO CARES.. =.="

Told ya to send me to hospital, but noooooooooooooooooo, you duwanna listen.

(sarcasm much)

Which is kinda shocking, despite eating alot, I check my weight, and I lose 4kg?!

Shit! I'm soo dead.

44kg.

SHIT SHIT SHIT !!

I've tried eating like a pig, then sleep right away after supper etc, still drop!

shit la!

Mom say something SHITTY also.

Saying I might suffer Thyroid . Shit la!

If that happens, send me to hospital la!

rather than saying I imagine. Shit!

Sorry for my indescent word. Just feel so pissed off.

T_T

but then, Thyroid is just something like throat cancer or something which was suffered by my mom's generation, every generation most likely to have it.

I dunnoe abt me. I couldnt care less abt myself.

=.="

argh! this headache is wrecking my head.

what a nerve-wrecking situation.

Tomorrow, gonna go out and have a slow walk to clear my mind.

Since this morning was so pathetic.

why not tomorrow. (:

and duh, will lie my parents le that I go with friends, but actual fact, I do things ALONE.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.........

But I think I go out super damn early, want see sunrise from the hill(:

It will help me keep distracted with nature's beauty.

Okay, Change Topics!

Just now watch tv documentary abt Sumos.

dun ask me why, other channels got boring shows =.="

so while watching I saw this sumo giggling happily,

So my eyes remain glued to the screen, it was actually a tortoise.

They lay it upside down, an the woman(or the cooker?) cover the tortoise head with a rag

and PRY open its head !!!

FREAKS la they all!

I jump from my seat and hell yeah I accidentally swore at them.

I was in SHOCK .

my sis ran away to the kitchen.

and the Sumos Drank its blood.

FREAK!

I pry their head then they know how an animal feels when they were innocently killed.

STILL A BABY TORTOISE you know!

wow.

damn those tortoise killers! >:(

Skin them alive baru tau. grr!

K, Good Bye Readers / Stalkers!

2010-06-11T19:57:00.002+08:00

Kept on having breathing difficulties...pfffffft!

Well, planning to do morning jog nearby, maybe sitting at the hill near my school.

Just wanna clear my mind..=.=" Been distracted from just now.

Anyway, it'll be a good time to write a song. hehe! got the rhythm, so why not giving it a shot.

and I need to take care of my health from time to time.

Got to force myself to breathe isnt good. well it isnt at all..

=.=""""""

Good night Readers / Stalkers.!

2010-06-11T10:27:00.001+08:00

WOOOTS!!!!!!! Finally got to watch GLEE ep 18 ! Finally!

2010-06-10T21:51:00.002+08:00

A Gullible Fool

As much as I want to say, Its not 100% Like. Sorry again. I say it out wrongly.

Its 100% LOVE.

How stupid typo I've made. *facepalm*

Super duper sorry if my derogatory remarks kind of harsh to you.

I know, I tend to be abit SARCASTIC and tell everything off..

adoi ! ps much le. Want to text that, but too bad ppd low.

as much as it hurts, err...dun worry le,

It won't jeopardise our friendship.

But, let's forget everything.

Stick to friendship. =)

Haiyoo! Want to play this piano song :

Gnossienne #3, Eric Satie

super Haunting tune = Super NICE!!!

Currently learning, Adagio by Beethoven.

I play suckish, no need to say.

=.="

quite slow I shall say. but...

WHO CARES !?!?!

Did abit studying.. and did all the homeworks HALFWAY..

Well, geog...errr...no comments okay. So many =.="

I have nothing to blog basically.. aiyaiyai..

Feel like going Library, but ntah ey. takut mak marah plak. =.="

Sis is searching for new job . All the best to her =)

Been having headache...ADOIII!!!

irritating ya know!

Went to Tiara hs pun, most of the time I lay on her bed, while Tiara n Fyka do their thing.

and at the same time Watching FIGHTING SPIDERS !!!!

hehehe~~!!!!

My Classic Fav Tv Drama .. =DDD

watching that brings back quite a memory.. =))

ok ok ok...what else to blog anyway?

ermm...nothing I guess..

ouh yar.. the new Lady Gaga song : Alejandro..

the PRONUNCIATION ppl, its "AH-LE-AN-DRO"

NOT "JAN-DRO"

sheesh! Tried to correct someONE's mistake just now, abe kene marah alik plak!!!

ADOI !

Nk betul kan mistake org, tapi tk tentu pasal kene marah alik ! grrr!

=.="

Hello! I learned SPANISH, I know la!

Though I'm not proud of it ler.

Just saying it.

USUALLY their "J" in Spanish is pronounce as SILENT "H"!

Name just like "Julio", becomes as "Hulio"

DUN ASK ME WHY! Its like that already !

=.="

okay

Got nothing else..Good NIGHT Readers / Stalkers !

[V](^O^)[V]

2010-06-08T22:59:00.005+08:00

Triplets <3

What a song ! Soooo relating to my past...akakaka! I like I like..

Fit my way of singing BUT not the high notes.. too bad I have not much of the capacity to project my voice that loud and HIGHER.. boohoo..! but, WHO CARES ! haha!

I can't believe it, I searching for those who can teach me how to play DRUMS.. =.="

LOL! dun nid to know why. Only between certain people know why. =P

But confirm if mom and dad found out about my need in learning of drumming, DIE I tell you..aha! They had enough of me learning music.. xP well, duh, Study comes first. xP no comments! hehe!

alamak... kene tunggu lain mth for Qns tuu..adoii! nk tau ! curious bangat !!! ahh! hehe,..

takpe..soon soon SOON okay. btw, smlm nye qns aku terlupe nak take down..keke! sorry kawan.

Dah pukul 11 lebih sey, trus terlupe..paisey paisey..x) tapi I still remember only one qns about wat u type in the msn PM ..=D

Please Don't Speculate. Appreciate it if you don't jump into conclusion. Thank you.

okayy...tts all folks / Friends / Stalkers !

Gd night.

Juliet Freak

Live Life. Breathe Life.

Movie and Show Biz

My Frustration. My Life. My Story

What the FLUTE!?!?!

Expressway

Where's the HUMANITY, Humans?!

NEXT TIME, BEFORE

PUTTING BLAME ON ME.TELL PEOPLE THAT I'M A BAD PERSON.GOSSIP ABOUT ME.BELIEVE WHAT THOSE BITCHES SAID ABOUT ME.STOP TRUSTING ME.ACTING INFRONT OF ME.PRANGAI BATU API.HERE'S A TIP FOR YOU

-> GET YOUR FUCKING RESOURCES

RIGHT ABOUT ME

DEN YOU CAN SAY

WHATEVER YOU WANT ABOUT

ME, OKAY BITCHES?!

bomb says:

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bomb says:

Helping an injured old lady and shelter her to safety on the first

day of Puasa really did make me smile the whole day(:

Gnossienne #3, Eric Satie

PUTTING BLAME ON ME.

TELL PEOPLE THAT I'M A BAD PERSON.

GOSSIP ABOUT ME.

BELIEVE WHAT THOSE BITCHES SAID ABOUT ME.

STOP TRUSTING ME.

ACTING INFRONT OF ME.

PRANGAI BATU API.

HERE'S A TIP FOR YOU